How often do you look at everything that’s right about you? If you’re like most of us, that would be about infrequently to never! Looking at what’s right about us is not something that we’re generally encouraged to look at or ask!
It’s not odd to even hear things like: “I only criticize you so you know what you need to improve”. Or what about: “Rise and shine, a new day dawns offering you new opportunities to better yourself.” The idea seems to be that by focusing on what’s wrong, we will be motivated to do “better” and be a “better” person. How well does that work? When someone points out your “faults”, does that create a desire to excel (where you will be more of a target), or to retreat and even give up? Many churches and spiritual groups also focus on “sins” or how “unbalanced” you are. Schools tend to label students as “bad” if they don’t follow the school rules and come up with appropriate answers. All of these examples are of course no wrong, or exhaustive, however they do have a common element – that of judgment! It’s someone else’s idea of how you should be and where you’re “not good enough”!
When we buy the idea that we should focus on what’s wrong with us, it sets up a pattern of always looking at the negative and discounting the positive. This creates such a distorted picture of ourselves that it is difficult to even begin to create the life we desire, for many people decide that they are not worthy or deserving of a better life.
What if you acknowledged yourself for what was right about you? What if, every morning and evening you asked yourself, ‘What’s right about me that I’m not getting?’ What kind of change might that create?
By only looking at what’s “wrong” with us, how easy is it for us to be the gift we are to the universe and world? Not much since wrongness is not synonymous with being someone that’s valued or a gift in any way. If reading this sends you into a spiral along the lines of, “But I’m not a gift – there’s way too much wrong with me!” What if that wasn’t true? What if all of that judgment you have of yourself is hiding the very unique being that you are? What if you were willing to let him or her out of hiding? What if you were willing to be kind to yourself and the world by looking at what’s right about you?