“Every definition is a limitation, by definition,” points out Gary Douglas, best selling author and founder of Access Consciousness® seminars.
Every definition that you are anything also asserts that you are not its opposite. Would an infinite being be defined as anything, or could they be anything they chose?
“Being undefined is the greatest possibility there is,” says Dr. Dain Heer, Douglas’s business partner and author of the book, Being You, Changing the World. “Being defined means we must refuse to receive anything that doesn’t match our definition of ourselves,” Heer points out.
- Read Chapter 10 of Being You, Changing the World: The Potency of Being Undefined DOWNLOAD HERE and get details about the next google hangout with Dain HERE!
Heer has developed a list of some of the most common ways we lock ourselves into limitation by refusing to be undefined.
He calls the first of these get-into-jail-and-stay-there strategies hanging onto “the safety and security net.”
“You have been taught to always have a point of view about you,” he says. This safety net includes “what to accept, what to reject, whom to judge, how to judge you.” These are all conclusions and judgments, Heer points out. If you’d like to change any area of your life, you have to change the conclusions you have in that area that are defining you.
Another limitation that keeps us jammed into the boxes of our own limited, defined reality is the unwillingness to do without motivation. “Most of the world uses motivation as the driving force for everything they choose,” he notes. Motivation is an external factor we use to get us to do things we don’t really wish to do, in many cases. When you release enough of your judgments and conclusions, you can get to what Heer calls “the place of un-definition, where you could sit on the couch and watch TV all day long, just because.”
Even though a lot of the pain we have created can also disappear when we lose our motivation, many people find it most uncomfortable. When we get to the place of wondering who we are and what we would like to do, it can be so uncomfortable that we jam ourselves back into the boxes of our limitation.
Heer points out that one of the “most common, interesting, and insane strategies we use is to recreate the traumatic and dramatic place we used to function from. We all have our own repetitive pattern that we use to keep ourselves defined and limited.”
Sometimes we can’t believe we got out of the garbage we got out of, so we go back and create all of it all over again just to prove to ourselves that we really can get out of it! How many times have you created your own personal load of limitation just to prove how potent you are in getting out of it?
What’s your favorite limitation? Your favorite issue? Most of us have one area of life that we use to continually give us a problem to solve, an issue to resolve, something to work on, a way to show ourselves we cannot have our lives show up with total ease, joy, and glory! What’s yours?
Many people create and recreate relationships to tell them who they are. Others define themselves by their perpetual money problems. Others create a disaster in their bodies. Others create any of these, just to avoid being bored, which is the worst thing they can imagine.
If we give up all these limitations, we may find ourselves expanding and becoming so much space that we feel uncomfortable and afraid we’ll be alone. Then we limit and contract ourselves again because we are not willing to experience being all alone. “In this reality, being alone is a wrongness so ugly we are not willing to look at it,” says Heer.
The ironic reality about this particular definition is that the more we are willing to be alone, the more people will actually want to be with us. “They will be attracted to you like moths to a flame,” says Heer. “You won’t be able to get rid of them.”
What would happen if we actually avoided all these traps and expanded beyond all definitions? “It’s the greatest of all things you could do to create your own reality,” Heer says.
Would you be willing to be so undefined you could acknowledge that you actually create your own reality and your own life? Or would you prefer to stay in the box of others’ definitions of you? The choice is yours.
If you want to explore this topic with Dr Dain Heer Live on the next Being You, Changing the World Google+ Hangout & Bookclub, this month is based on Chapter 10, The Potency of Being Undefined.
Imagine for a moment if you had no name, no past and no definitions of who, what, when, where, how and why you were supposed to be? What would you choose? What if, being you, is always a question? Are you willing to be that undefined? What if that space of being is the key to infinite possibilities?
During this hangout you will explore what is truly possible when you’re willing to go beyond everything you’ve decided you are.