One of Access Founder and best selling author Gary Douglas’s favorite saying is, “Ask and you shall receive.”

In answer to the questions he’s frequently asked, he says, “Receiving isn’t blocked, it’s refused!”

Refusing to receive what you’ve been asking for—what’s right about that you’re not getting? What would it take to change that? Would you like to get out of your own way? Here are some tools you can use to do just that!

A primary tool of creating everything you would like is to ask questions. Questions invite possibilities, answers and conclusions block anything additional from showing up. If you conclude it’s not possible to do something you’d like to do, for example, the universe cannot send it to you.

One woman said she wasn’t going to some events she really would have loved because she didn’t have the money. Asked by an Access facilitator if that was a question, she insisted, “No, really, my savings are used up!”

When the universe is dealing out financial gifts, it has to pass her bank account without making a deposit because she’s already concluded nothing can flow into it!

What have you concluded about what is actually possible in the realm of receiving what you’ve been asking for? If you’re asking for it but you’ve already concluded it isn’t possible, can it actually show up for you? Or does the universe have to pass you by just like the woman who’s concluded she’s broke? She may well not have any money at the moment, and what else could be possible if she were to be in the question about her financial situation? What else could show up?

Will you destroy and uncreate all the conclusions you have about receiving, right now? Right and wrong, good and bad, all 9, POD, POD, shorts, boys and beyonds®

A second factor that keeps us refusing receiving is our mis-identifications and mis-applications of what receiving really is. Most of us as children have experiences where we’re given “gifts” that have obligations attached to them. Being much more aware and even psychic than we’ve ever acknowledged, we sense those obligations and often resent and resist them. All too often, we think that the obligation that’s been put on us is a mandatory component of receiving. This is actually a lie. Whenever you buy a lie—and all mis-identification or mis-applicationis a lie—it creates an area in your life where you cannot get free.

When someone gives you a “gift” and they attach obligation to it, you are not obligated to buy into or believe that obligation just because they want you to. It is in your best interest to be aware of the obligation in their universe, as having that awareness of where the “gifter” is coming from can be helpful to you. Although you now have the awareness that the obligation the “gifter” is trying to create in you is neither real nor obligatory, they will most likely continue to see you as obligated to them. If you accept their gift without buying the obligation that goes with it, you may experience some anger from them. At least now, having read the past two paragraphs, you now have a choice!

Their point of view and yours can be different. You can be aware of their intention to obligate you without having to feel obligated or fulfill their obligation.

Everything you’ve mis-identified and mis-applied receiving as, and all the ways you have mis-identified and mis-applied receiving as obligation, will you destroy and uncreate all that? Right and wrong….

A third dynamic that can keep us from receiving is the judgments we have about what people who have what we’re asking for are. In other words, if you’re asking for more money than you can spend, and you have the judgment that rich people are rude, unpleasant, arrogant or unhappy, can you really receive the money you’ve been asking for? If you have the judgment that thin beautiful women are just way too sexual, sluts even, can you actually create your body to be as attractive as you’ve been asking for it to be?

All the judgments you have about what it would mean to have/be what you’ve been asking for (fill in your own personal wishes here), will you now destroy and uncreate them all? Right and wrong….

What is your relationship with receiving? Did you know you have one? A relationship is by definition the distance between two objects. If you have a relationship with receiving, it means you have put a distance between receiving what you’ve been asking for and you. This is perhaps not your best choice.

Incidentally, one way to create this distance between what you say you’d like and what shows up is your use of language. When you use the word “want,” for example, you are telling the truth. “Want” actually means “to lack.” When you say, “I want more money,” you are saying what’s actually so. You lack more money and will continue to do so as long as you use that language.

Replacing the word “want” with the word “desire” is only a marginal improvement. Do you ever actually get what you desire, or are your desires always somewhere in the future, always expected but never actually arriving in your life? How about saying something that could create what you’re looking for, such as “I’ll have….”?

Step one to changing this situation is to change your language. What you speak and think is what shows up in your life. Step two is to destroy and uncreate your relationship with receiving every day. This has worked miracles in many cases. Are you willing to be one of them?

The last step in derailing the freight train of refusing to receive what you’ve been asking for is to be vulnerable. We have many ideas about what vulnerability is. Often we think it means going without protection and being open to all sorts of hurts. Vulnerability does mean giving up the barriers that we’re used to having to protect us. But like the walls of a castle, those barriers not only keep invaders out, they keep us in and unable to receive the gifts visitors might bring.

Lack of vulnerability is also a huge limitation to our awareness. And with our increased awareness comes choice. If we are aware of what’s ahead that might not be too fun to experience, we have a choice to move out of the way. That choice is only possible with the awareness that vulnerability brings.

If you dare, you can even apply that vulnerability to yourself. If you were really willing to be vulnerable with yourself, you could become aware of exactly what you’re being and doing to keep what you’ve been asking for from showing up in your life. What if somewhere in your infinitely unique and personal universe, a sizable part of you actually likes the limitation you’ve created more than you like actually receiving what you’ve been asking for? Yes, that’s right, what if we actually prefer complaining about NOT having what we’ve been asking for more than actually having whatever it is?

What would it take for you to destroy and uncreate that?