Tis the season to think of the gifts that we can get for others, what gifts could you give yourself this year? There are 3 gifts to give yourself this year, that don’t make you fat, drunk or miserable. They don’t cost any money or take time away from the chores and activities of the season.
What are they? I’ll bet they’re not what you think!
3 Gifts to Give Yourself This Year.
Hint: they’re not what you think!
Give yourself the gift of Imperfection
The expectations for the holiday season can bring enormous pressure from colleagues, family members, children, spouses, friends… Not to mention the enormous pressure that we tend to put on ourselves.
Everything has to be perfect. The food, the presents, the parties, the way you look. The list of essential perfections goes on and on.
What if you didn’t have to be perfect? Perfection is a low standard. Why? Because it’s unobtainable. Perfection for you will be different from what perfection is for me, or the next person or the next. It does not exist.
Ask: If I wasn’t trying to be perfect here, what could I choose?
When you are willing to not be perfect, you create space. Space that is not there within the walls and limitations of perfection. Space for different possibilities to show up. Possibilities that may be even greater and more fun than the “perfect” that you were previously striving for.
When you let go of being perfect, your body can relax, your being can relax and the people around you can relax. In that space of relaxation, what more can be created?
When I say “relax” I’m not talking about the “slobbed out on the sofa” that has been sold to us as “relaxing”. No. I’m talking about expansive, generative relaxation. The way that you relax into a smile. From that space of relaxation, what else is possible?
Give yourself the gift of Allowance
Being in allowance is not being a doormat. It is not “making allowances” for people’s bad behaviour. You don’t have to accept people’s nastiness and meanness.
Being in allowance is about recognising what people are doing and being, not being blind to it or pretending that it’s OK.
It’s about acknowledging who and what they are, without judging it.
You don’t have to put up with it, be at the effect of it or be in resistance to it.
Allowance can be a tricky one at first, so what if you started your adventure in allowance by being willing to be in allowance of you. And the first place to start being in allowance is to stop judging you.
If you were willing to be in allowance of YOU, what gift could that be to the world this holiday season?
So how is you being willing to be in allowance of you, a gift to the world?
So when you’re not in allowance of you, you’re in a constant state of judgement. You’re beating yourself up with “shoulds” and a constant battering of wrongness.
How much fun is it to be around someone who is constantly beating themselves up?
If you were willing to be in allowance of you, how much more fun could it be for your family, friends and colleagues to be around you this holiday season?
It could even be more fun for you too!
“Allowance is a creative energy, that allows you to be in the question that allows you to change anything.”
Gary Douglas, the founder of Access Consciousness in his recent telecall on Allowance.
The gift of you
“The gift of me?” I hear you ask. Surely this is the season of gifting to others, thinking about others and re-connecting with people we perhaps don’t see the rest of the year.
So my question to you is:
When you are relaxed, is it more fun for others to be around you? When you are relaxed, is it easier for others to relax around you?
When we are trying to be everything for everyone else, so often that is done from trying to be something that we are not.
When you deny who you truly BE because you are so busy trying to be what you think other people want from you… you negate the gift that you are.
There is no-one else that is you. You are unique, one of a kind. The more you are willing to be the true you, the more of a gift you are in the world.
So everywhere you have bought the lie that you have to be something different from what you inherently are, would you be willing to let that go now?
What’s right about you that you’ve never considered before?
If you were the gift in your life, what could you choose?
So however you choose to spend this festive season, what could be possible for you and those around you, if these 3 gifts to give yourself this year were something that you were willing to unwrap?