Being You

5 Tips to Have the Simultaneity of Giving and Receiving

September 10, 2015

Guest Post by Marilyn Bradford, MSSW, Med, and Certified Access Consciousness Facilitator

I used to think that contribution was about “me” doing or giving something, as in: I gave $100 to the shelter or I’m driving one day a week for Meals On Wheels. The energy behind the actions was one of superiority, as in “I’m helping these people” and “I’m doing good in the world”.

Since using the tools of Access Consciousness, I’ve found that there is a completely different and much more expansive way of being the energy of contribution.

So far this is what I know to be true for me concerning contribution:

1. Contribution involves a commitment to being aware.

2. Contribution requires being the question of “What will create more?”

3. Contribution requires a willingness to be in the simultaneity of gifting and receiving.

4. Contribution involves the Kingdom Of We rather than The Kingdom Of Me.

5. There’s no judgment in contribution.

The Tips In Action
Recently I was in the Houston Airport waiting for a flight back to Albuquerque. It was one of those very crowded and chaotic gate areas where many flights are leaving from the same area. I noticed an elderly woman from Guatemala who was clutching her passport and boarding ticket and looking very confused.

We started a conversation even though she spoke no English and I don’t speak Spanish. I admired her clothes – she had made her whole outfit. She was concerned about which gate, where to go etc. She was joined by her husband who seemed equally bewildered. I checked their tickets – we were on the same flight – and then contacted the gate agent to make sure she would walk them down during the pre-boarding.

They were so grateful it brought tears to my eyes. The couple was met in Albuquerque by at least 10 people. Everyone was so happy. They started waving to me and thanking me and I was (thank you Access) able to receive it totally. In the past I might have said something like: “No problem, I was happy to help” (superiority). Instead I received their gratitude and happiness as the gift it was.

What I’ve realized is that any action can be done from a variety of energies. It matters less what the action is and more about the energy it comes from.

When we act from superiority – it’s out of the decision and conclusion that we know best. The action or comment is from the Kingdom Of Me, and it’s imposed on the other person.

When we are being the energy of contribution, there is no greater or lesser, it’s a dance of joy!

Any time we think we know what is best or right for another person, we are dishonoring the other person. We may think we are contributing to their future by “knowing what they need”, but that attitude has nothing to do with awareness – It’s based on judgment and a conclusion.

Perhaps it’s easy to fall into the trap of “knowing what others should do” because we are all trained by this reality to “do”.

What if being the energy of what’s possible and being you was the invitation for others to choose more?

What if that is a true contribution we can all be?



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Sep 15, 2015

Ineteresting application. Thanks for your perspective.

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Robynne Cottle

Sep 16, 2015

So true and inspirational. . Thank u for contributing to my day!!

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Sep 17, 2015

So, in the given situation shall I ask ” what’s possible here for me m the other person ?”

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Access Consciousness

Sep 24, 2015

That would be a great question!

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