By Katarina Wallentin
When I started Access, my main issue was really how to BE. And I mean with everything and everyone.
I was so darn accomplished and likable and good at everything. And yet I was utterly confused about who I was.
When I was a kid, I was…different. I was told I was childish, a bit weird and way too nice. And on top of that I was really good in school. In fourth grade, I was so bullied that my parents moved to another part of town, and I got to start again, at another school.
I made sure I would never be bullied again. I started to wear the in-clothes, said the ‘right’ things and made friends with the most liked and coolest girls in the class. I discovered that I could be really, really good at that as well — at fitting in.
My strategy was quite basic: making sure people LIKED me (even though I was dead sure that if they saw who I truly be, they definitively would not). I became a star chameleon!
And life went on. I very successfully used my chameleon talents everywhere I went — at university, at work, living abroad, creating relationships. All of that. I was exactly what was desired and then a little more than that, to top it off. It worked well, according to this reality; I had a great life, an amazing resume, a nice salary, a fitting relationship and a sweet kid.
Until I just couldn’t do it anymore. I was missing ME and LIVING so much that absolutely nothing made any sense any more. Something had to change or I would…explode. I became an avid seeker and I tried everything under the sun to fill that empty space.
After a couple of years of different kinds of tantra, mantra, and meditations, I came into contact with Access Consciousness. (Thank you, Rosario!) And the one thing that stayed with me after the first round of classes I did wasTHE FIVE ELEMENTS OF INTIMACY — allowance, trust, gratitude, honor and vulnerability.
They made total sense to me. They made total sense to the strange kid I once was. Those five elements literally transformed my life from the day I first heard them.
They’re now my beacons in living. They’re with me in everything I be and do and continuously ask for. They keep expanding and deepening the possible space of being in ways I could never imagine. And if I go to judgment of anything, these elements are what I use to check what is really going on. Judgement and intimacy just cannot exist at the same time.
That weird kid in me really would like to know!
Gary Douglas and Dain Heer are starting a tele call about the THE FIVE ELEMENTS OF INTIMACY on Sep 10th.
I’ll be on. Will you?